So, a couple of hours ago, I had a clear idea of what I wanted my first post to be. It was going to be thoughtful, organized, and give you the highlights of the “why” behind this blog. But then, “Z” wanted apple juice, the dogs wanted out, then back in again, and then “Z” wanted YouTube Kids turned on, then she had a poopy, then she spilled her juice, then hubby video chatted me through Facebook to let me know the school nurse was trying to get a hold of us.
I called the school nurse back, and “A” was in the nurses office three times that morning. The first time, she was shaking, so they gave her some soda crackers and sent her back to class. The second time, she was pale and not feeling good, had a huge bowel movement, and felt much better, so back to class she went. The third time, she threw up in the nurses toilet. Since then, (over an hour), they had been trying to get a hold of me to pick her up. “Z” was watching YouTube Kids on my phone, and rejected the calls, apparently. I apologized for my delay, promptly gathered up “Z”, put on a hat, grabbed my keys and purse, and was off to pick up “A”.
Somehow, this morning, up until the time the nurse called, I had been able to start to set up this blog, create my Facebook Page, create my header graphic, and lay the groundwork for the foundation of this journey – all the while being interrupted approximately 2,356 times. (Okay, I might be exaggerating a bit, I do that sometimes…)
…and that, my friends, pretty much sums up a typical day in my life. So, right now, I’m coining the phrase “Swagger Interrupted”. Yup, that’s me!
I have accomplished great things in my life, overcome obstacles, challenges, and have beaten the odds many-a-time in my past. But, for the past 3-4 years, instead of driving my life, my life began to drive me. I’ve been knocked around by life’s interruptions non-stop. That’s not unique, right? I mean, life NEVER actually goes as planned – this I know. But see, my most EFFECTIVE years of my life I was single and had few interruptions. I could charge forward with my own destiny in the palm of my hand. I made things happen! I had a vision, and I wouldn’t stop until I reached what I saw… not anymore.
So, somewhere along the way, I lost my Swagger. The vision(s) are still there, but I have been paralyzed by the massive amounts of interruptions in my life. I have the qualifications, the experience, the know-how, and the drive to accomplish any goal – if I can get a solid amount of focused time to work towards it. But this, my friends, is no longer my situation.
So, for years, I’ve been grasping at my Swagger… I’d see the sparks of the life I wanted, almost light fire, and then it would be stifled out again, and again, and again, by real physical obstacles. I had learned how to overcome the obstacles in my mind. I had thought that was the secret to my success. But…..
<Crap, hold on!>
Okay, I’m back. I had to chase “Z” to get “A’s” barf bag back, because “A” was squealing that she needed to throw up and “Z” stole it and was running around the house… Don’t worry, I got the barf bag just in time, to stick it under “A’s” chin. After cleaning things up, (and explaining to “A” that if she had time to chase “Z”around the house, she could have just made it to the toilet – the place I prefer for her to puke), things are quiet, for now. Currently, “Z” is hiding from me because I mentioned that it was nap time…
What was I saying?
See, what I mean!? I was on to something, something huge, and yet again, my Swagger was interrupted. Let me look back – oh wait, that’s exactly it! That was what I was getting to!
I have been living in the past. I have been expecting to CREATE the optimal conditions to regain my Swagger. But in reality, those optimal conditions no longer exist. So, I have to figure out how to get my Swagger back in my new environment. I can’t help or coach anyone else until I figure out how to coach myself in my new circumstances.
So, that’s my journey.
Please join me!